Wednesday, February 22, 2006

The Taiwan Blogosphere: Advice to the lovelorn

One hazard of blogging on Taiwan came to both Daniel at Suitcasing and myself today, as we got letters asking for advice from the lovelorn. There must be a pretty steady supply of these letters zooming out to Asian bloggers.... Spake Daniel:

Someone recently asked me for dating advice. Specifically, about flying from the US to here, to see a Taiwanese woman he'd become familiar with over the Internet.

As I've actually received a few emails like this before, I thought I'd post my response, in case you too are planning a first meeting with a mysterious Asian woman.

Basically, I don't have much advice. It's the kind of topic where you could say a million things or nothing: what an individual (Asian) person wants, it's impossible to say. Maybe this woman just enjoys chatting to people online and got to really like you, maybe she just wants to meet someone new, maybe she wants to get married, maybe she wants a Western husband, maybe she wants to emigrate, maybe she doesn't know what she wants, maybe she's preparing to steal your money and any children fathered from your loins. I could cite anecdotes about all of the above.

Daniel goes on to offer a double-date service, in which Daniel vets the prospective g/f.

I got one of those today too

I am from _______. I am -- years old. I find i am attracted to asian girls and not much westerners. I find this a huge problem, as asians here tend to stick to themselves. I am not a weird or strange type of westerner that can't find a girl here, just i am not attracted to westerners. I am told i am very handsome, nice and genuine guy, good communicator, well educated too....So it is not that girls aren't interested in me, just seems impossible to meet asian girls here etc I was thinking of going to japan or taiwan to meet a girl for long term - marraige (1 prob with japan is there are few christians and i am christian..also i heard often they don't want to leave japan). Is this a crazy idea, to look overseas, especially considering what i have read about taiwanese having no interest in anything but work etc..and their attitude that everything about them is superior to westerner - we can't control our emotions, sex maniacs, lazy, don't value family......Any advice - i am going crazy trying to solve this problem.

I gave him the same advice that Daniel did: come here and find out. It's different for everyone.


Xiao-Yu said...

Hey Michael! Have you thought about running an Asian bride agency with Daniel in Taiwan? I'll be in too! You try to get the nice men from the west and I'll get the nice ladies from here. We can make a big fortune!!

Michael Turton said...

Sounds like a plan! We'll let Daniel handle the customers. He has an honest face.

Anonymous said...

I don't see how the FUCK you could possibly say that you only like Asian women from outside of Asia... you mean you like, let's say, Asian Americans? I think there's a whole shitload of implicit racism driving whatever it is you're thinking. Your sorry ass fetish of "Asian" women can't even distinguish between Taiwan or Japan or Asian immigrants? Living in either place would be completely different you ignoramus. If you're just interested in some kind of mystical Hollywood dragon lady/TV News Connie Chung mold, you should just watch Memoirs of a Geisha a few times and fulfill any "needs" with your own Christian God-given hands.

Anonymous said...

I worry I'd frighten the men off with my "Cultural differences" speech...

L.Michael Walker said...

In some ways I agree with the previous anonymous post, not with the disregard of common decency. What I would like to say is that any person with the idea that Asian women are their ideal partner should consider the consequences of their decision to move to a foreign country to find a bride. Does this person understand the cultural differences and the dedication it will take to assimilate to the desired brides’ culture? Are these people taking into consideration that they may have a fantasy about what an Asian woman might be like? I would just warn those in contemplation of taking this gigantic leap in cultures to consider what they are really doing.
I’m currently in a relationship with a Taiwanese. The differences in family opinion about interracial relationships have caused hardship in the relationship to start. Do these people who want to move to Taiwan or Japan think about the families of the women they plan to create a relationship with, and what the said families will do in this instance? My advice is to think long and hard if you are planning to change your whole life and cultural views because you have a perceived liking of only Asian women.