Monday, November 03, 2014

Some Comedy

Dogs on bike paths *sigh*

This is an actual news report of an actual upcoming event:
In order to provide people of foreign nationalities in Taiwan with the best tax experience and to prevent false receipts or unidentified sources of information, the National Taxation Bureau (NTB) of Taipei, Ministry of Finance (財政部臺北國稅局) is holding a talent show to promote taxation awareness on Nov. 9 in Daan Park at 1:30 p.m.

The Ministry of Finance invites foreigners over 14 years of age who are not native speakers of Mandarin to come and give performances related to paying taxes, all in Mandarin. Performances include story-telling, singing, rapping, comedy and mimicry.

Besides foreigners performing on stage, there will also be well-known street performers to open the show. Other events include tax-related academic games with prizes and gifts to hand out, tasty food and DIY handicrafts.
In the wake of the Ting Hsin food scandal, this joke is again making the rounds...

An American, a Russian, and a Japanese are exploring the jungle when they are set upon by cannibals.

The American guy says: "Oh, I am all fat. No meat at all. Not good for you." But the cannibals eat him anyway.

The Russian guy says: "My flesh is soaked in alcohol. You don't want me, tastes terrible." But the cannibals eat him anyway.

The Japanese guy says: "I'm Taiwanese."

The cannibals don't eat him.
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6 comments:

Anonymous said...

Re: Talent show.....very bizarre. I suggest they put their time and $ into making a better, more useful English website instead. (included an easier to find fa piao(?) receipt page).


Re: Dogs on the bike path, here is my "pet" peeve.... I find it absolutely disgusting that people with pets think its OK to allow their dogs to sit on tables and chairs in Taiwan. This happens on an almost daily occurrence especially at McDonalds. There is nothing like eating your food from a table that a dog's butt just touched.

In addition, the smokers they allow to sit at their outdoor tables create a nasty smoke cloud that you have to walk through to get inside. I've spoken to managers numerous times plus have tried to contact McD TW corporate via their website, but of course, they don't post contact links.


Andrew Kerslake said...

I love how they are inviting foreigners to openly break the laws they were just as eager to enforce a couple months ago.

an angry taiwanese said...

Ko rode a bicycle on one or two of the bike-lanes in Taipei. He discovered many problems. A few 'going ahead' arrow signs painted on the lane pointed directly toward a tree, a concrete block, or a dead end. He swore that if he were the mayor, he would have found out and scorn at the persons who were in charge of that the ridiculous design.

Isn't the bike-lane a good wrap-up for Taiwan's status quo? Wouldn't the dog on the bike lane be President Ma and Chairman Xi the one holding the leash?

les said...

That's about the funniest Taiwanese joke I've ever heard!

@Anon: Stop eating at McDonald's.

@Andrew: The spirit of a law preventing foreigners performing is to stop them doing a job better for free that a local would charge for. Sometimes they go with the spirit of the law and not the letter, depending on who's involved. It is ironic though.

StefanMuc said...

Maybe Taipei needs a website like this from the Warrington Cycle Campaign:

http://www.warringtoncyclecampaign.co.uk/facility-of-the-month/

Anonymous said...

@Les, I hear you, but my Taiwanese girlfriend doesn't like Taiwan breakfast. Plus, there are 3 McDonalds within walking distance to my house plus... It's only NT$49 for a coffee and a sausage muffin. If I go to Dante or Ikari, cost would be at least double. (Not really, a big deal..and I like the coffee at McDonalds)

And lastly, its not just at MickeyD's, its at other food places too. I see dogs on tables almost daily. Just today, I saw a women walk her dog into a bakery (with open shelves)