Sunday, October 11, 2009

Sarcasm Circulating among the Taiwan blogs

This advertisement from the government asks riders to take care of their "nau dai gua" -- a local way to refer to the head and brain -- because it will split like a watermelon in an accident, "gua" being the word for melon.

A friend sent me this sarcastic description of Taiwanese life that has been circulating in the Taiwan blogosphere....


在台灣 ..
In Taiwan...

People who possess both working experience and a diploma become government officials. And those with the power of money and the gun become legislators.

People who aren't afraid of death, but will eventually die become “little brother” bag-carriers. And for those who are afraid of death, but won't die in the end become “big brother” gangsters.

People who lie all the time even without preparing what they will say make themselves “big officials” in the government ranks. And those who lie but read their prepared speech anyway become little officials. Those cannot lie even when reading a prepared script have no post in the government at all.

Naturally beautiful and capable girls become celebrities. Beautiful but incapable girls become strippers.

Those being punished by their teachers and then realize their mistakes are elementary school pupils. And those hitting their teachers and then realizing their mistakes are junior/high school students. And those not even knowing what the mistakes are are college students.

什麼都知道但最好別亂開口的,當財經官員。什麼都不知道但拼命亂開口的,當教育官員。 Those who know everything but keep their mouths shut are government officials working in the Ministry of Finance. Those who know nothing but boast every now and again are working in the Ministry of Education.

Those who know everything but are ordered to keep their mouths shut are Education Ministry staff. Those who know nothing at all and have nothing to say have no post in any department.

People with brains and ability become directors in the department. And those with brains but no ability become junior directors in the department. And those without brains but with ability become head of the office in the bureau of the department. And, last but not least, those without brains nor ability are parents in their own house.

If you want to be rich, be a doctor; if you want to be famous, be a lawyer; and if you want to die from rage, become a teacher.

And, ahhh...if you want to die from work, be an engineer!
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Tuism said...

This doesn't only hold true in Taiwan...

Άλισον said...

Are these quoted from one single blog or from various different blogs?

Some of my translation would be slightly different:

my translation:
Those who know nothing at all and therefore dare not say anything can be posted as government officials at any level.

院長 = premier 部長 = minister
局長 = bureau director

沒腦筋沒能力的人當家長, why?

In Chinese 家長 generally means "parent" but it could also mean many things depending on the context:

people's 大家長 could mean the leader of a nation.

a party's 家長 could imply the leader of a party.

I don't understand all the sarcasm if it was quoted from one single source.

China Debunked said...

KMT officials, even in the USA are saying to people that the money not spent for "UN for Taiwan" campaigns and 10/10 are being used for other projects. Apparently whatever they think will help them garner support, and it seems people are lapping it up.

"Yes we are spending money on this music event because its better than spending massive amounts of cash on UN for Taiwan".

"We skipped out on Double Ten however that funding can now by used to help the expat community".

Somehow I don't buy it. There's something that stinks.